Please promise me that you won't ever watch the movie called The Fountain. Thanks.
This post is going to be reminiscent of my thoughts on The Last Mimzy, only opposite.
Last night the Brod and I went to good old Hot Ticket Video to peruse the titles we've missed out on over the last month or so, and boy did we choose a winner. Remember your promise, people.
Here's what one reviewer, S. Burns, had to say about this painfully pretentious and ridiculous movie:
"It's tough to kick a mewing kitten, even one this stupid and ugly."
"We keep cutting back and forth to bald Jackman in outer space, journeying through the cosmos inside a gigantic soap bubble containing the only tree I've ever seen that has pubic hair and makes sex noises. It's some sort of spirit oak that seems to have Weisz's life force trapped inside the bark, which Jackman has to eat to stay alive."
"How does one explain to a studio executive the necessity of the scene in which Hugh Jackman licks the vaginal secretions of a moaning tree, only to find a bouquet of spring flowers bursting out of his mouth?"
So true.
I know this makes no sense if you haven't seen it - and I'm sorry if you have - but don't be tempted. I know the pubic hair tree is enticing, but don't do it.
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